When your vanillin demethylations all fail and you can't even get the stuff to
turn into a nitrile, you need a pick-me-up.
And we recently acquired the perfect bit of lab equipment to facilitate the ultimate pick-me-up.
Here it is.
A coffee maker from Saigon.
Let's have a closer look.
It looks like it's made of thin stainless steel.
And if we open it up, you can see that there's a perforated sheet at the bottom for the coffee
to filter through.
We love coffee and the stuff we had on our recent videos.
Our recent business trip was really seriously good.
So let's have a go ourselves.
We also acquired some Vietnamese coffee.
This is from a place called Dak Lak which is apparently where the good stuff comes from.
It's quite coarse ground as you can see.
Not like espresso or even a European-style filter grind.
And you know what?
This really reminds us of something.
Coffee on the left.
But what's that on the right?
Looks similar doesn't it?
Any guesses?
Yup, it's red phosphorus.
Ain't that some weird shit.
Here's the coffee.
The color is slightly different, but not by much in real life without the strong lighting.
So it turns out that not only is coffee useful for smuggling class A drugs.
It's potentially also a cover for class 1 precursors as well.
well coffee just gets better and better so let's start by making a cup we're
using 30 grams of the coarse ground Dakhla coffee so first we place this into
the filter and a gentle shake just to even the grounds out into a flat surface
don't try to pack them down now we place the top filter component gently on top
of the coffee grounds and now we're ready so get some water boiling in the
kettle and now we're going to add just a little bit to start with in order to
moisten the grounds that's all we need now we leave this for two to three
minutes so that the grounds swell up as you can see not enough water yet for
actual coffee to come through
okay a few minutes later and we can now add the bulk of the water reboiled
freshly about a cm from the top of the filter gently make sure there's no gap
between the coffee and the top filter the lid goes on and now we wait
okay we're done
check out that intensity of color that is some serious coffee
in fact let's get this into a beaker and have a closer look you'll notice that
just for once we've really scrupulously cleaned our beaker you'll see why later
holy cow it's almost orange ochre in tint we're almost scared to drink that as
it is so first let's get some cognac in there about 15 mils know that's still
going to mess us up if we drink it
let's add some cream to dilute things about 50 mils
you can keep your hipster latte art yeah baby we're going back to the sixties
with this shit now that is coffee art
looking tasty
now let's add some sugar – a nice big spoonful to help that daklik medicine go down
this is just too good to drink we've got a better idea let's make a real
pick-me-up Italian-style we'll get this in the fridge while we get to work
okay we're going to need some sponge fingers buying them is very..."un celebrations have come about".
for the lazy if you want the good stuff you make it basic sponge cake
ingredients 100 grams of low gluten cake flour low gluten means three to four
percent so the cake is light 120 grams of castor sugar okay now for some eggs
we've split them up three yolks three whites and now something to make it a
30 grams of butter and 50 mils of full cream milk we've got a big bowl we're
going to first create a meringue with the egg whites and sugar you've seen us
do this before so we'll zip through the process first we use an electric mixer
and get the whites into a nice foam
now we add half the sugar and a magic ingredient a small pinch of cream of
tartar this is acidic and helps stabilize the meringue whisk it up again
Nice.
Now the rest of the sugar.
And finish it off.
Here's our starting meringue.
Now we're going to add the egg yolks to this and whisk to incorporate.
Now we'll take the cake flour and sieve it into the meringue.
After adding a bit of flour we use a large spoon and fold this into the mixture.
All in.
You shouldn't lose much volume.
Now the butter and milk.
We need to mix these and melt them together.
The easiest way is to combine and then use a microwave for a blast or two.
Okay we've got a mixture that's still lukewarm but melted together.
If it's over about 50 degrees then let it cool a bit.
Now we're going to slowly add this to the mixture and stir it in.
Slowly is the key.
Don't try to make a soup.
Keep the bubbles in there.
Here we go.
All incorporated.
Let's get this into a buttered springform pan and bake in the oven at 170 degrees C for
about 45 minutes.
Great we've made a sponge cake.
Let it cool for a minute and then turn it out upside down onto a plate and then allow
to cool completely.
Don't worry about trying to make it look good.
It's all going to get squished anyway.
Okay we've got a cake and some coffee.
Now we need some ridiculously decadent creamy smooth airy light stuff to go with it.
That's something we can manage.
Like chastising a bad servant to make them good again.
Just going to require a lot of whipping.
First some healthy stuff.
250 ml of whipping cream.
250 grams of mascarpone cheese.
We've mashed it up to make it easier to mix.
Three egg whites, like before.
Three egg yolks.
And 50 grams of castor sugar.
We're going to start with these two.
We're going to start with these two.
We'll use a smaller bowl so we can whip them up more efficiently.
Egg yolks and sugar whipped together well, turning a paler color as they combine together.
Whipping.
Whipping.
Whipping.
Whipping.
Whipping.
Whipping.
After about 10 minutes they become quite thick and form a ribbon texture.
So now we add the mashed up mascarpone cheese.
It mixes in surprisingly easily.
So this is our base mixture for the mousse.
We're now going to add whipped cream and meringue to this in order to lighten it up.
So get a metal bowl chilled in the fridge, and add the whipping cream.
Then whip on a low speed for about 10 seconds.
Okay, this is it.
So let's first get the mascarpone egg yolk mixture incorporated gently into the whipped
mixie.
Now we whip the 3 egg whites into a stiff meringue, but without any sugar.
Medium stiff peaks.
And we'll now fold this gently into our mascarpone mixture.
The finished product.
So now we've got our coffee, our cake, and our cream.
It's time for assembly.
Cut the cake into thin slices.
Use the plate with a serrated knife to do this.
Layer the cake in the bottom of a dish.
Add some coffee mixture to soak into the sponge.
Then a layer of cream.
Then repeat.
Feel free to play games with your guests.
Then top with high-quality cocoa powder.
Now that's a picked cake.
You can also make crazy cool style desserts in wine glasses as well.
If the filter tree didn't work for your sex life then this should do the job.
Serve with psychedelic 60s style creamy Vietnamese coffee and get down and groovy baby.
There's no end music on this video.
Just food porn.
Stay tuned.